Forgiveness and new beginnings.

Hello beautiful sparkly spirits!  It’s so good to see you here.  Tonight I want to talk about forgiveness and new beginnings.  I remember the day that I decided that I was going to forgive all of the people in my past who had done me harm.  This was not an easy task as some of these people wounded me so deeply that it took me years to recover.  Some of them even hurt me physically and I bear the scars on my body from this as well.  It’s a hard thing to release when you wear a reminder of abuse, but it can be done. 

The magic of forgiveness is the freedom that it brings.  Suddenly I was no longer burdened with the heaviness of resentment, anger and bitterness.  Suddenly I was free to live my life on my terms and in love.  And you know what else happened?  Some of the people I forgave, actually began to change.  Perhaps they sensed I no longer had barbed wire fences up when I was around them.  Perhaps they felt the light coming from me.  I’m not sure.  What I am sure of is that I changed.  And really, that is what is most important to me. 

I refuse to waste my life holding on to anger and plotting revenge against people who hurt me on purpose.  I refuse to give them space in my head or my heart.  That is reserved for wonder and magic and love.  Life is too short to live it any other way. 

So we all know what happens when we make a decision in this direction right?  Yup, you guessed it.  Something inevitably happens to let us practice this new direction.  This week, the wonder dog let me practice.  I was in the bathroom and I heard a familiar sound.  It was the sound of thievery in the kitchen.  The wonder dog stole an applesauce cup from the counter and proceeded to lick it clean.  Now even though I discourage this behavior, I don’t really blame her for her penchant for fruit as I share this same love of all things fruity. 

The problem arose when she got said cup stuck under the shelf in my studio and was unable to retrieve it from underneath.  So, given this dilemma what is a dog to do?  Why knock all the things off the shelf and attack it from another angle naturally.  This would all be well and good except she destroyed two canvases in the process.  One of these was already primed with a background for a commissioned piece.  Can you say, “Mommy was NOT happy?”  Here is the picture of her destruction. 

Canvas destruction

See the applesauce cup under the shelf?

 
After the initial gasp of horror all I could muster was, “Maddison Isabella!”  She didn’t say a word.  She simply looked at me as if to say, “I’ll be over here in my house.”  She promptly walked to her house and stepped inside.  I followed her in silence and closed and locked the door. 
 
I was so mad that I posted about it on my soap forum.  A lot of the women on this forum have animals so they can relate.  I logged out and went and had some lunch and calmed down.  When I got home I let her out of her house and said the words, “It’s okay.  I forgive you.”  She actually smiled as she gave me kisses.  Don’t tell me animals don’t understand english.  I won’t hear you.  LOL!  We had a little smooch fest and all was well again.
 
I logged back on to the forum and sure enough some of her Aunties had posted things in her defense.  Many even offered suggestions about how to think out of the box and use the canvases in a way other than painting.  The more I thought about this, the better I liked the idea.  I was actually able to laugh about it and thank God for giving me an opportunity to be creative in a whole new way.  I was completely happy and knew I would do something wonderful with them at some point.  I also thanked him for all the wonderful women in my life who help me look at things with new eyes and humor. 
 
Now this alone was gift enough for me.  I was centered and smiling and had learned another valuable lesson about perspective and forgiveness.  However, one of my friends had other plans.  I went to check my email and I had money in my paypal account.  This friend had sent me some money with a note that said, “This is for art supplies.  The world is a better place when you create.” 
 
I was so surprised.  I just sat there stunned for a minute.  Then I just giggled and thanked God.  I thanked him for the money but mostly for my friends who never cease to amaze me with the way they give and love others.  This particular friend makes me want to be a better person every time I interact with her.  She is just that kind of special.  She reminds me that giving is a gift I give myself every time I choose to give to others.  She also reminds me that surprising other people with gifts is mega cool.  I love her large and so does everyone I know who knows her.  She is such a joy to me.  I immediately emailed her to say thank you.  She wrote back, “Just consider it Maddison’s bail money!  LOL”   Did I mention I LOVE this woman?  I was laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes. 
 
Thank you for taking the time to read tonight.  I hope you got a little warm fuzzy reading this.  I sure got them living it.  Aint life groovy?!!  I’m so glad you stopped by and I’m so glad to have you in my life.  I hope you are feeling blessed and loved today.  I hope tomorrow you will go out and bless and love somebody else.  It always always always comes back to you! 
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Published in: on July 7, 2011 at 11:42 pm  Comments (2)  

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2 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I enjoyed this. I must say ur point is very important. Forgiveness does produce freedom. And a lot of times we must forgive ourselves before we can truly let go too. I like the bail money. It was a reminder of someone truly wonderful I kno. Could this possibly be the same person? If so she is a Blessing to kno. Luv the story. Take care

  2. Hi Stephanie!

    The person who bailed Maddison out isn’t our friend here but she is just as wonderful and has the same loving spirit. I’m simply surrounded by awesome friends! 🙂 It’s so good to see you here. *HUGS* I hope to see you soon. Your site looks great!


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